adimoga

First, we have to understand that self knowledge can't be learnt in a few days or weeks but it might require years. I say this taking into consideration my life experience, but I'm pretty sure that it happened to you too. Maybe you remember when you were younger and you were saying: “how I was thinking a year ago and how I think in present”, and the following year you were saying the same thing about the year that had just passed.

The tool we can use to reach a better self knowledge is the question "Why?", the only question that can help us understand the reason of a feeling or reaction. One of the biggest mistakes we do is when we ask a question and in the first phase we have the impression that the question is silly, we are told that we are grown up and we are not in the age of questions anymore. Now that is completely wrong! While we live, we have to self motivate, try to understand what's at the base of things that influence our life, but to understand them, we have to accept and begin to understand a big part of the questions we ask or that we should ask ourselves.

Through self knowledge we manage to understand what we really what to do in life, why we choose our partner and many other things we start to ask after a certain age, the age when we start to deal with the problems of life such as food, money, a house, the car etc. While the time is passing, these questions are consuming so much of our energy that we start to ignore our psychic, and after a certain age you don't have the same flexibility and energy, becoming harder to restyle. This is why, when you start having questions, you don't have to hesitate in looking for an answer.

I think that the hardest part in the process of self knowledge is that we will realize the mistakes done not only by us but also by our parents, educational mistakes which were implemented in our structure as an individual, perceived as normal/good, and which we will not only multiply day by day but also transmit them to our children, when we will reach the age of adulthood. The educational mistakes, which we are aware of, don't result out of the non interest of our parents. It happens because they at their turn have been educated as such, and because all they want is all the good for their children, so they teach them what they consider and perceived as being good at that period of time. And you will realize this when you will hear: “When I was your age I wasn't wondering around in the streets” etc. Basically, the education each child receives is a big part of the education that the parent received from his parents and styled up on the whole with what the parent liked or disliked.

This process of self knowledge is nothing else that an invasion of the conscious over the subconscious through the question "Why?", meaning a psychoanalysis. My opinion is that a big part of our psychic is represented by the subconscious (the memory), and the conscious represents a smaller part. The subconscious is built in time by assimilating the information and experiences through the conscious part and their filtration as good or bad. The subconscious is accessed many times through the reflexes, and these are perceptions formed inside the subconscious, but not always healthy. That is why it's important to understand why you make some mistakes by reflex and what impact they have on you.

If you ask me, our psychic (as I defined it here), represents the flux of energy which applies on our biological matter, and the conscious represents the experiences in that particular moment, meaning that what you feel now, is actually the conscious. That's why the self knowledge represents the process of re-living mostly the feelings from the past years where our affect was styled not only by our parents but also by the other persons in our life. All these experiences analyzed and passed by the filter of our perceptions as being good or bad, will help us having an easier and healthier life, psychologically speaking. The problems we ignore, at some point will appear in other parts of our life, as well as in the life of those we educate.

In one of the next articles I will explain some of the questions I ask a person that I just met, and I will detail not only the question but also where that person is placed in my mind.

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French version here: Connaissance de soi
Romanian version here: Cunoaste-te pe tine